killtheanimals (
killtheanimals) wrote2018-07-08 05:28 pm
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Week 5 - Saturday, Mitsuru; Post-Trial
[When Mitsuru finds him, it's in a tree away from the others, black sorcerer's robes wrapped around him to further conceal his presence. He's curled up in the branches, staff in his lap, Ragnaruk clutched tightly in his hand, shoulders shaking with the occasional silent sob.
He probably hasn't even noticed her, given the lack of reaction. To say he's doing poorly would be a huge, huge understatement.
In the end, he is, after all, only eleven- no. Twelve, now.]
He probably hasn't even noticed her, given the lack of reaction. To say he's doing poorly would be a huge, huge understatement.
In the end, he is, after all, only eleven- no. Twelve, now.]
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[she is so, so woefully unequipped for. . . this. her own losses still sting her greatly, the pain from same still buried deep in her heart like a barb. she doesn't know how to make this better. she wishes she did]
There was a point in my life where I would have said the same. [she opts to empathize instead] Where I would have forbidden myself from showing any outward signs of emotion or weakness, for the sake of appearing strong.
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[He isn't a pleasant person. Makes no attempt to be. He'll continue to be honest with himself until the day he dies, and he's only too aware it could in fact lead to that time.]
Now isn't the time.
[It never is.]
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[she says firmly, so there's no doubt in her words. what she says next is softer, though]
If now is not the time, then when will it be the time?
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...When I get my wish.
[When everything's been fixed, when he can be a child again.]
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And. . . what is it you wish for, Ashikawa?
[boy, does she know what it's like to have one's childhood forcibly ripped away from them]
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Ren, who killed the one other person who may have put it together.]
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...Years ago, on this day, there was a man who murdered his family. His wife, his daughter - if his son hadn't been out playing, he would have murdered him, too.
[There's an involuntary sob. He thought he'd grown past crying over it, but right now, it feels like he could start all over again.
It's all so unfair.]
My wish is that it never happened.
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[Mitsuru strains to hear his words, and then bolts up to her feet when they process, eyes wide]
What. . .?
[her exclamation is surprisingly quiet and breathless]
Ashikawa. . .
[. . . and he's just a kid. a mature kid, just like Ken, but a kid nonetheless]
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Any of this. Because for all he's endured, finally, finally, he's met his limit, crushed under the weight of responsibilities he can no longer bear.]
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I am so sorry, Ashikawa.
[for bringing it up, when he's still mourning over Boa]
My wish for you. . . would be that that never happened, too.
cw: suicidal ideation
I--
[His voice is shaking.]
I have to get back. I have to...
[If he can't return to Vision, can't get his wish--
What was any of this even for? Why did he suffer through all of this?
Why didn't he just die, on that fateful day so many years ago?]
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[that, at least, is firm]
You, and Boa, and everyone else who has died.
[she steps away from the tree and tilts her head back to look up at him]
. . . it may not feel like it right now, but I won't allow for any other outcome.
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It's so, so hard. And he's so, so tired.]
How do you... How can we...?
[Is it really even possible? He has a hard time imagining it, at this point.
But he wants to. Because the alternative is just too horrific.]
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We have confirmation that the souls of our dearly departed friends are still there. That the rock spirit is holding onto them for unknown purposes.
All we must do. . . is convince the rock spirit to let them go. To return them to their original bodies. Those bodies may not be in perfect condition, but. . .
It's a beginning.
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They aren't even human anymore.
[None of them are, if you really think about it.]
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[to her, the state of their bodies doesn't matter. so long as they still maintain their humanity, then everything should be okay. right?]
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